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How to change your habits with celebration

Try this celebratory way to create lasting habit change

Have you considered that there could be a delightful way to create sustainable habit change and meet big goals without gross ideas of restriction, discipline, carrot/stick motivation, and willpower?

I hadn't. Frankly, I was done with all mainstream habit change ideas - they smacked of patriarchal dogma.

That is until my teacher introduced me to Celebration and Shine and the work of Stanford's BJ Fogg (an expert on behavior and long-term habit change).

This work centers on celebrating tiny habits, thereby freeing us from restrictive dogma and inviting the use of our intrinsic motivation system; our emotions.

How celebration changes your habits from a neurobiological perspective:

Our emotions & body sensations are more powerful triggers for behavior change than the mind. Think about it, if all it took for me to get up early in the morning was to think that I wanted to, then I would do so with no effort. However, this is not the case! Because my body hates getting up early, the thought fills me with dread, and therefore am unlikely to change this habit with ease.

Now ponder this: We want to do things that feel good. Our primal and limbic brains get on board with good feelings. We then make choices that align our lives in the direction of good feelings- cortex be damned! (This is one reason drug addiction is a challenge to heal.) If my body delighted in the experience of early rising, then there's a great chance I would do it*.

How celebration changes your habits from a spiritual perspective: Good feelings, like compassion, love and joy, are qualities that create wholeness in ourselves and the world around us — making the world a better place for all.

Conversely, restriction, willpower, or discipline create separation and take massive energy to sustain, causing suffering.

What moves humanity toward peace is not rejection or restriction; it's compassion. That doesn't mean we reject the rejection! No, we have compassion for rejection. We make our wholeness a true wholeness, where all are welcome.

Back to how to change your habits with Celebration

I honed this skill in 2021. It was one of the worst years of my life and, on a macro scale, there didn't appear to be much worth celebrating. At least, not in the way we think of celebration.

Let me preface by saying celebrating did not come easily to me:

  • As a recovering perfectionist, I couldn't see the point

  • My "not-enoughness" didn't allow me to see success as anything but hitting the big goal

(If this is also you, read on. This work is crucial for us.)

During those dark summer months, I dug deep and celebrated how I showed up for my coaching calls. When partner and I didn't dissolve into a fight over the stress of our lives, we celebrated how we held ourselves. I celebrated the pain of healing and growth and now, these habits are solid, and I am onto the next.

How to Celebrate and what does Shine feel like? If you're wondering how to "celebrate" if it doesn't involve a motivation like champagne, good, this is the right question!

Celebration is the little thing you do that fills you with the feeling of YAY! Do you toss a tissue in the basket and throw your arms up when you make it first try? That's the feeling. Do you land a new client and do a little dance? That's it too! Shine is the feeling in your body; celebration is the action.

For clarity, I've made a short video on this. The "Shine" is palpable. Witness me celebrating my mediocre day (and more 😉)

With this in mind, I invite you to start changing your habits now and share three celebrations with someone you trust:

  1. What's a bigger goal you're working on?

  2. What's one tiny win you're celebrating?

  3. Fogg says, "Emotions create change," what does that feel like in your body?

There's real magic in being seen in our wins because it helps our primal fear based brain rewire for safety. Reach out for support - I would love to witness you.

Book a complimentary connection call HERE.

x nuria​


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